Frank, dear, I think you've been spending too much time on the internet.

This might have something to do with your personality disorder(s). Have you thought about consulting a physician?

Just kidding. For some bizarre reason, I laughed like I haven't since I spent every day after school at my best friend Susan's house, smoking pot in her bedroom and playing solitaire, and there sure wasn't anything funny about that either.

Hey! I miss seeing you once a week. I have a freezer full of venison summer sausage and jerky sticks. Want some?
 

Frank, when I replied to your e-mail, I got an error message back. What's with that? Send me an e-mail to scarletbgonia11@yahoo.com from a working e-mail address, and I'll send you my real (super-secret!) e-mail address.